Nothing But Holiday Limericks

Halloween Recipe Limerick for Kids

There was a young witch named Kelly
She wanted to make something smelly
An old sock and a toad
And a skunk off the road
In a pie, gave an ache to my belly.

A Young Witch Named Betty - Halloween Limerick for Kids

There was a young witch named Betty
She couldn't keep her broom steady
Try as she might
She couldn't take flight
I don't think she'll ever be ready!

Cry of the Banshee - A Halloween Limerick

When you hear the banshee's shrill cry
A person, high-born, will die
A murder, quite often
Is what fills the coffin
Then under the turf he will lie.

How To Carve A Pumpkin - Halloween Limerick for Children

Young Jack, the pumpkin, sat mute
Quite happy to be a round fruit
A boy with a knife
Made him fear for his life
But carved him a face that was cute.

The Legend of Sleepy Hollow - A Headless Horseman Limerick

There once was a fellow named Crane
With a fear of ghosts in his brain.
The man with no head
Filled him with dread
But was that poor Ichabod slain?

Or rather, did Crane in his fright
Turn tail, run, and take flight?
One never knows
How that story goes
Was Crane out of mind, out of sight?

A Young Witch Named Kelly - Halloween Limericks for Kids

There was a young witch named Kelly
She wanted to make something smelly
An old sock and a toad
And a skunk off the road
In a pie, gave an ache to my belly.

Wolf Man Jack - Halloween Limerick

There once was a wolf man named Jack
He was hungry and wanted a snack
He chased me and then
He turned tail when
I gave his fat snout a big whack.

Halloween Skeleton Limericks for Children

We heard some clitter-clattering
When the rain was pitter-pattering
We looked and discovered
A skeleton uncovered
And its bones were chitter-chattering.

A Halloween Vampire Limerick

A vampire is a very suave creature
Was the lesson Vlad tried to teach her
"He leaves his coffin
Just every so often,"
Said Vlad as he leapt up to reach her.

There Was A Dumb Ghost Named Liam - Halloween Limericks For Kids

There was a dumb ghost named Liam
In the dark it was quite hard to see 'im
But during the day
You might hear him say
"Watch me seize the carpe diem!"

Memorial Day Limerick

We're sitting here tweeting and friending,
So let's just stop all the pretending,
The freedoms we use,
Are easy to lose,
So honor those who've died defending.

A PIRATE NAMED MOLLY - 56 Limericks for Kids

Now Available at Barnes & Noble, Amazon, and Createspace - Limericks for Children

There once was a guy named Randy
He thought rhyming words were dandy
His young daughter Kate?
Her pictures were great!
They hope that you keep their book handy.

Now available at Barnes & Noble, Amazon, andCreatespace.

A GUINNESS ST. PATRICK'S DAY LIMERICK

'Tis sure we'll be wearing the green,
When the calendar says March seventeen,
We'll be happy when in us,
Are pints of black Guinness,
Try some, you'll know what we mean.

A HARP LAGER ST. PATRICK'S DAY LIMERICK

'Tis sure I'll be wearing the green,
When the calendar says March seventeen,
I'll drink a few Harp,
'Til my wits become sharp,
Just try some, you'll know what I mean.

A SMITHWICK'S ST. PATRICK'S DAY LIMERICK

'Tis sure I'll be wearing the green,
When the calendar says March seventeen,
To help me to think,
It Smithwick's I drink,
Just try some, you'll know what I mean.

Saint Patrick, He Is A Great One

That Patrick, he is a great one,
His staff, it's surely a straight one,
He drives out the snakes,
While good Christians he makes,
Of Ireland, he is the patron.

Abraham Lincoln - Presidents' Day Limericks

Lincoln was Illinois' greatest resident
That was proved by his time as president
- Kept the country together
Despite stormy weather
To do the right thing - never hesitant.

A Valentine's Day - Advice From Cupid Limerick

If you don't want to spend your night cry'n
Remember your sweet Valentyin'
Please don't be stupid
Just listen to Cupid
A small gift with nice flowers should do fyin'

Groundhog Day Limerick for Kids

There once was a groundhog named Phil
He liked to keep out of the chill
On Feb. 2 he saw
His shadow grown tall
So he scurried back under the hill.

Christmas Limericks For Kids - A Wreath Named Jo

There once was a wreath named Jo
She was proud of her big, red bow
Her circle of greenery
Made beautiful scenery
In the light of the fireplace glow.

A Nasty Old Grinch - Christmas Limerick

If he acts like a nasty old grinch,
And the sight of him makes you flinch,
Treat him with kindness,
Perhaps you will mind less,
Though his heart grows not even an inch.

The Reason for the Season - Christmas Limerick

I hope that your Christmas is merry,
And your jolly St. Nick is hairy,
But remember the reason,
for this joyous season,
Is Jesus, and Joseph, and Mary.

A Pretty Young Elf Named Clare - Christmas Poems for Kids

There was a pretty young elf named Clare

She picked out her clothes with great care

Her friends said to hurry

"Just wear something furry,"

But she couldn't decide what to wear.

A Reindeer Named Paige - Christmas Limericks For Kids

There was a young reindeer named Paige
She flew very well for her age
But instead of flying
She'd rather be trying
To dance The Nutcracker on stage.

An Elf Named Molly - Christmas Limericks For Children

There once was an elf named Molly
She braided her hair with holly
She helped Santa make toys
For good girls & boys
Her favorite - an old fashioned dolly.

Leap Year Limerick - A Maid Demure

This is a Maid demure,
She wants a man for sure.
She's had one or two,
But they will not do,
So another she'll try to secure.

Thanksgiving Limericks For Children - Jake Was A Happy Young Turkey

Jake was a happy young turkey
In fact, you might call him perky
But that little bird
Was so sad when he heard
That he soon would be pemmican jerky

Thanksgiving Limericks - A Turkey Named Brock

There once was a turkey named Brock
He proudly led his whole flock
But he just couldn't see
Their grim destiny
And they all ended up in a wok

Thanksgiving Turkey Limerick

Dark clouds may overcast the Sun
The day be dark and murky
But you will find
If not too blind
Sunshine around each Turkey

At A Halloween Party A Ghost - A Limerick

At a Halloween party a ghost
As he walked arm-in-arm with the host
Said: "Unseen to play tricks,
And with people to micks,
Is the thing that amuses me most!"

Linus, Sally, and the Great Pumpkin - A Halloween Limerick

Our Linus and Sally did wait
In the patch, for the Pumpkin, Great
But as Sally feared
It never appeared
And a candy-less night was their fate.

Cried Witch To Her Cat - We Must Go

Cried a witch to her cat - We must go
And visit these people belo
Who say that they doubt us
Yet can't do without us
They're the most inconsistent I kno

Witch's Brew - Halloween Limerick

Bedazzled by the likes of you

So charmed by all you say and do

On Halloween Day

You blew me away

Heck. . . blame it on the witch's brew!

A Cream of Wheat Halloween Limerick

Said a ghost who was pale and transparent
"I should eat Cream of Wheat," it's apparent
But it's so nutritious
I'd get too ambitious
And leave my old haunts . . . so I daren't!"

An Olde Halloween Limerick - Said a Bat to an Owl in an Oak

Said a Bat to an Owl in an oak-
"This Halloween Night is a joak!"
And that wise-looking bird
Replied: "Yes, it's absird,
I was thinking so when I awoak."

A Labor Day Limerick

On Monday we celebrate labor
Whether you, your wife, or your neighbor
So let's give a shout
And push the kid out!
Oh sorry - not that kind of labor?

There Once Was A Vampy Old Witch (Halloween)

There once was a vampy old witch,

The thought of her near made me twitch,

But she had a nice twin,

With a similar grin,

My thought? Which witch was which?

Whether lass or laddy,

They honored St. Paddy,

The crowd? They all clapped and hurrayed.

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